It’s been hard to avoid the refrain “Don’t blame me blame Brett. Blame my ex” when scrolling social media over the past couple of months. The tongue in cheek writing deservingly struck a chord with listeners as it was playfully honest and had this unique perspective when you dived deeper into it. And The Beaches have a lot more music like that for you to discover on their poignantly titled sophomore record “Blame My Ex” (out now). 

The Canadian rock darlings have created a beautifully honest and cathartic record that explores what happens on the other side of a break-up. Finding a way to contextualise their feelings that surpassed the dissolution of it, the album reflects on the emotions you face whilst moving on. Through highlights like “Shower Beer”, “What Doesn’t Kill You Makes You Paranoid” and “Me & Me”, they were able to bring listeners perfectly into that world and state of mind.

I recently chatted to lead vocalist Jordan Miller from The Beaches about refraining from relying on the “lol” in her songwriting and finding a more vulnerable tone for this record, explored writing about her and bandmates queer identities, and reflected on the viral success of “Blame Brett”. Check it out BELOW:

THOMAS BLEACH: Your sophomore album “Blame My Ex” is an empowering, honest, and relatable record that explores grief and finding yourself again following a break-up. It feels very liberating as a whole body of work. Was that specifically important for you to put that feeling out in the world with some honest truths grounded within it?

JORDAN MILLER: I mean, you just said it very well right there. I wasn’t sure what I wanted to make when I started this record initially about a year and a half ago. And then back in August 2022 my relationship ended, and I was like, “Oh, this is gonna be what I’m gonna have to talk about”. There was this never-ending string of feelings, and the only thing that would make me feel better was trying to contextualize it through songwriting. It was sort of like therapy for me.

The more I wrote, the more I realized I didn’t want it to be a record about the dissolution of my relationship. I wanted it to be about what happens to someone after you experience a love that is lost, and what happens to you and like the ebbs and flows of that. 

Some days you experience a little bit of catharsis. Like, that’s what “Me & Me” is about. It’s embracing being sort of happy, being alone, and the pleasure of being single and doing things like eating dinner by yourself. And then other times you experience social anxiety, and that’s what “What Doesn’t Kill You Makes You Paranoid” is about. I just thought that was interesting. Breakups and heartbreak is obviously a common theme with a lot of musicians, but I hadn’t ever heard a lot of records just about what happens to you afterwards. And that’s what I wanted this record to be about.

TB: I feel like you’re right there. Like now I’m thinking about all the breakup records I’ve been listening to in my life, and they’re all about the present moment, and not about the next chapter. There really is no rule book for that. There’s so many different explanations about how to get through a breakup, but what do you do when you’re on the other side and how do you restart?

JM: Exactly. What happens? Like, okay, you’re single now and you have to start fresh again, but you’re not over your ex and that makes things difficult. There were so many interesting things to dig through for me. Everyone assumes “Blame Brett” is a breakup song, and it is essentially as it’s about feeling heartbroken, but it’s also a song where I’m apologising to my future partners because I’m not emotionally available for them. Everyone thinks Brett is the bad guy, but I’m actually the bad guy in the song. 

TB: There is a polish to this record, while still having a bit of a gritty punch of your debut record “Late Show”. What would you say is the portal track from “Late Show” to “Blame My Ex”?. 

JM: I always like to think of our EPs as sort of like the portals in between like two records. I think where you get to start to hear us being a little bit like this record is on a song called “Orpheus” that we put out last year. It’s a song about missing somebody who you used to love in high school. I used the Orpheus legend as a way to play with that idea of long lost love.

I think the earnestness of that track was sort of a portal to this record because I think where this record differs from some of our other stuff is that it’s a lot more earnest and a lot more adult sounding. I’m relying less on my tongue in cheek humor and my jokes, and I dive into pain and grief in a literal way with being less goofy. 

TB: Are you someone that always feels like you can only be vulnerable if there’s a “lol” attached? 

JM: Absolutely! It’s easy to sort of face pain with humor. But I think sometimes it can be a bit of a crutch for me personally. So I wanted to remove some of that because I can really rely upon it a bit too much, especially in previous records. Like “T-Shirt” from “Late Show” is about being rejected after a one night stand. It’s a really funny song with pure humour and irony. So with this record I wanted to try to remove that shield a bit and be vulnerable. 

TB: This is a break-up record. And we are all aware how important break-up records are in so many people’s processes. So what have been your personal go-to break up records to get through in the past?

JM: Gosh, that’s such a good question. Honestly I’ve been listening to my ex’s music when I’m feeling really sad and I miss him, which is really bad, but his new record is about me too. So “Glory” by The Glorious Sons is what I’ve been listening to. I think the two ones that are really about me are called “House Light” and “Dreams”. 

Other than listening to that record I was listening to a lot of  Joni Mitchell, Bob Dylan and Angel Olsen. I don’t necessarily need to listen to songs that are about breakups during those moments, it’s more about songs that put me in the same emotional place that I’m feeling wherever I am during my breakup. So if I’m feeling horny, then I’ll listen to a certain song. Or if I’m feeling really sad and depressed, a different song will help me. 

TB: Let’s dive into “Edge Of The Earth” which is this big cinematic fuelled song that feels like it could soundtrack a coming of age romantic comedy in some of its darker moments. When you listen back to this song do you hear a very visual identity within it?

JM: “Edge of the Earth” is one of the most interesting songs on the record. It’s not actually about my breakup, it’s about my bandmate Leandra’s relationship. Leandra and I are queer, and we really felt it was important to finally write about that. 

Lelandra and her partner are a very fiery couple. They’re always kind of on the verge of breaking up or getting back together. And to me I wanted it to have that cinematic feeling, because that’s sort of what their relationship felt like as an observer. It was a bit like a Nicholas Sparks rom-com. I wanted it to feel like one of those first loves of your life songs. 

TB: How have you found reclaiming your queer experience in music so far?

JM: I actually just had this conversation on a podcast with the girls from The Aces about certain terminology. They’re all lesbians but for a long time they used the word queer to describe themselves because the word “lesbian” was a very loaded word for them. But they’ve started to really embrace it and re-call themselves that. I’ve gone by “queer” a lot because it’s a little easier to just generalise. But other times I’ve said I’m bi or pan. I’ve been publicly out since middle school. Basically, it’s on my Facebook, so it’s always been out there.

Leandra faces a lot more irritating comments because she’s been in a relationship with a woman longer than maybe I have. I’ve only ever been in one proper relationship, and it happened to be with a man. 

TB: “Kismet” is a bit of a standout on this album with its dominating guitar riff, hand claps, and catchy vocal delivery and hook. So can you explain the creative process behind this track?

JM: That was actually the first song on the record that I did. I wrote it in Nashville when I was very hungover. It was one of those sessions where I didn’t know who I was going to be writing with, and I ended up writing with a guy named Dan Agee.

I’ve always loved that word, “Kismet” as it means like fate or destiny, and I’ve always wanted to write a song about it. It’s a bright moment on the record, but it carries a different context and we did have to make it sound a little bit more in line with the rest of the record. It was a lot more poppier before, and yeah it sort of sounds like a Cardigans track that’s got a bit of an indie sleaze vibe to it. It’s very catchy and fun. It’s my favourite to play live too because I don’t have to play bass and I finally get to have my lead singer moment and just run around. 

TB: “Shower Beer” has one of my favourite lyrics from the album – which is; “Alphabet soup spelled you’re a foul, but I still ate it all the same”. Can you tell me about the story behind this lyric?

JM: That’s my favorite line on the record too. That’s another one I wrote before my breakup, and I feel like you can kind of tell that things are going bad for me. But at that moment I didn’t realise it. It’s very funny how you can tell on yourself with your lyrics, and maybe understand what’s going on before you’re actually able to face it. 

The line “shower beer” came from my sister who had been hung over the day before the session and said that she had had a beer in the shower. I was like, “that’s just such a great line”, and realised there was definitely a song there. 

TB: “Blame Brett” is a song that has since had a complete life of its own and welcomed you to a whole new audience thanks to TikTok. What has been your favourite video you’ve seen using the song?

JM: Oh my god, so my favourite was when Jonah Hill’s ex girlfriend started sharing all of those text message screenshots to socials. She would always share them using break-up messages over them, and right in the middle of it she used “Blame Brett”. So there’s a piece of history there. 

TB: The concept of this song is so great as it’s essentially hearing you say to someone new that you’ve got some trauma and you’re probably going to self-sabotage, but don’t blame me for it, blame my ex. And I love that ideology because I always say I wish I could send my exes my therapy bills because they are the reason I’m there. And I feel like this is the song version of that statement. Do you also agree we should get exes to pay for therapy bills? 

JM: *Laughs* Yes, I do. It’s all their fault. It’s definitely them. Blame them *laughs*. 

TB: Alright, The Beaches Australian Tour… surely we are making this happen soon?

JM: I can’t say yet, but… *winks*.

“Blame My Ex” is out now!